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Article from Human Resources, Hong Kong, Nov 2005
Network for Life
“No person was ever honored for what he received.
Honor has been the reward for what he gave” – Calvin
Coolidge, 30th President of the United States of America
“Networks exist to foster self-help, to exchange information, to change society, improve productivity and work-life, and to share resources. They are structured to transmit information in a way that is quicker, more high touch, and more energy-efficient than any other process
we know. – John Naisbitt, Megatrends.
Speaking to a class of 40 under-graduates recently, I was pleasantly surprised that almost everyone knew what networking was, how to do it, and the importance of networking as they prepared themselves for the working world. It seems that their professors had taught them well, and shared with them the golden key that unlocks many doors even before they set foot in the corporate world. It was certainly very reassuring.
In my daily interactions with human resource professionals over the past decade or so, I noticed that many have increasingly become more comfortable with networking, realizing its importance and making conscious efforts to sharpen their networking skills. The plain truth is this: networking is one of the key skills much needed in effective management of one’s career, and for general corporate survival.
To this day, there are still people who think that networking is for those who are in sales and business. Networking is not selling something. Some hold the mistaken view that networking means asking someone for a job. Worse, some equate networking and speaking to strangers as ‘face losing’.
The reality is “networking” is a self-promotion activity, accomplished in a professional and tasteful manner. It is the sharing of knowledge and contacts with others who may benefit from acquiring these. There is absolutely nothing embarrassing about walking up to a stranger and initiating a conversation to begin networking. It is also not something to be feared.
In conducting a job search exercise, it has been proven many times that the most effective means to secure alternative employment is through networking. In this case, it will be acquiring information on job leads that can potentially lead one to a job interview, and eventually, a job offer.
Networking is a very powerful tool that everyone can, and must learn to make use of, from as early an age as possible.
In this article, I will share some tips on how you can begin to be an effective networker.
Networking can be both easy, and fun. Begin with people that you know already – the objective is to get to know them even better. You must be sincere in your showing interest in others – anything less will put people off straightaway. Some of us who tend to veer towards being an introvert can take heed that networking does not mean having to be the life and soul of the party. It is not about you having to go around slapping people on their backs and giving ‘high-5’s with everyone you meet. Sincerity and having a genuine interest in others are the order of the day – and if you possess these two attributes, you can be an effective networker.
The internet and electronic mails have been two of the most valuable inventions of the 20th century. It has allowed me to stay in-touch with the network of contacts I have around the world. And the best part is you can do this within a very short space of time – even as short a time as you would need to read this particular paragraph.
If your contacts are in the same geographic location, it may even be more effective if you pick up the phone to call, and even arrange to meet up for a drink or a meal. One important point to note – never offer to pay when making the arrangements. Some people may feel being patronized and may even be likely to reject your invitation although they would not mind having a meal with you. Simply say something like :”If you have some time next week, let’s meet for a simple lunch or a drink at a place convenient to you. It would be good to catch up”.
When both of you are ready to place your food order, do let your guest make the order first. For yourself, try not to order something that could potentially be very messy or challenging to eat eg chilli crabs! Go for something light, and easy to manage. Unless your guest orders wine or liquor, you would be wise to steer clear as well.
At the end of the meal, do offer to pick up the tab: “Let me take care of the bill this time, okay?” If you happen to be meeting corporate clients or potential clients, do not be surprised if they insist on paying. Some companies have strict regulations regarding socializing with service providers or vendors. They would expect their employees to foot the bill to minimize any potential charges of favoritism towards any particular vendor in the award of contracts, etc.
At a networking session, do remind yourself of the main reason why you are there. Eating and drinking should not be your answer! Most hosts of cocktail parties, for example, provide only finger food – there is a reason for this. So you can eat less, and network more. If you have to take a proper meal after the event, so be it. Best practice here is to use only one hand to hold a wine glass or a drink, so your other hand is free to shake hands etc. When approaching a small group of people, try to catch the eyes of one of them, smile gently and walk up to the group with confidence. Introduce yourself briefly and try to engage with the group by asking a simple question: “How did each of you got to know (name of host)?” And let the conversation flow from there.
Approaching a group of people talking can be daunting, but do remember not to make the assumption that you will not be welcomed. For all you know, everyone in that particular group could have also just met. If, however, you see two people talking and their body language and facial expressions suggest they already know each other very well, or could be engaged in a very personal conversation, return to them at a later part of the event.
Prepare your own “networking stories”. This is where staying in touch with current affairs is so important. Do note the common taboo subjects of religion, politics and anything that has a sexual connotation. Try always to share something that is of potential value to a wide audience. During a cocktail party networking event for example, you are likely to have a small group of people standing around each other – if you are able to ‘connect’ with almost everyone in the group, that would be the best. Otherwise, do use a specific networking story that you feel may appeal to as many people as possible. If it happens to be World Cup soccer season, for example, and you have an all-guys group with you, chances are that many of them could actually be football fans. If that is the case, you will have a ‘windfall’ – provided you have read up on the latest matches and are competent enough to share your knowledge and views. I make it a point to subscribe and read a wide variety of magazines and newspapers. From sports, to health/diet/exercise to management and business – I have them all. I may not have time to read everything from cover to cover, but I try. Two of my favorites are Fortune and Readers’ Digest, the latter having a wide array of inspiring and interesting articles that are potentially appealing to a wide audience of people.
What are some of the places to do networking? Actually, almost anywhere. I once introduced a potential member to my Rotary club during a elevator ride. Here was what happened. I got into the lift and this particular gentleman noticed my lapel Rotary pin. “Hey, you are a Rotarian. My father was one, too”. I replied: “Yes, I belong to the only breakfast club in Singapore and we meet Saturdays at the Hotel Intercontinental at Bugis Junction. Would you like to come join us some time?” “Sure. My name is William, and here is my business card. Give me a ring next week and we’ll see how we can stay in-touch”. “Cool. By the way, my name is Paul. Speak to you next week.” Just like that – networking done in the space of 30 seconds in an elevator ride. If you are looking to do some serious networking, some of the best platforms could be at HR conferences, breakfast talks organized by chambers of commerce, business organizations, product launches etc. Just make sure you prepare yourself with your “networking stories”.
Be generous with your praise. Human beings are such- they always feel good receiving praises. Find opportunities during a networking session to shower praises on others. Again, sincerity is key. Do no go overboard with your praises to the extent that you give others the perception that you are a cheap fake! If someone has succeeded in sticking to a strict regime of daily exercises, say how you wish you could do the same, and ask for some tips on how you can work towards emulating this person’s success.
Build and nurture relationships. Once you have begun a networking relationship, do take the effort to follow through and nurture them. I once nurtured a relationship for over five years before I got to do some business with a HR director of an American multi-national in the healthcare industry. Nurturing a relationship requires staying in touch and you can do this in a variety of ways. What I normally do is to send articles of interest and news clippings to my network of contacts. Once in a while, I invite them out for a simple meal or drink – not volunteering to pay when I made the invitation – and we usually talk about a great many things other than business. Something as simple as sending a “How are you?” e-mail can also be classified as an attempt to stay in touch.
Golden rules to remember in networking - do not be selfish, and do not abuse your networks, much as you wish to receive, and you must also be prepared to give. Remember, it the quality of your network contacts that is important, not the quantity.
Happy networking, and don’t forget the name cards and the breath mints!
Paul Heng, CMF
Founder/Managing Director
NeXT Career Consulting Group, Asia
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